Wednesday, February 15, 2006


A joke.

What do you call a guy on a black bike wearing black clothes, black gloves, black shoes and a big hat with earflaps tied around his head, also black, with no lights, weaving down the wrong side of the road in the dark?


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Tuesday, February 14, 2006


Unwanted bikes?

I didn't know that there was such a thing. These guys say they take them and send them to Africa but what about all the people in this country who are wanting to go down to the local skip and find a nice old hack that they can build into a super winter fixed?

This picture is cool, though. Can we get one?

Thursday, February 09, 2006


Federal Express eat your heart out

Hey look, guys! I've got a solution to those annoying winter delivery problems.

bike with skis

How cool is that? They have their own website also.

It says

Designed to travel on packed snow surfaces over rolling terrain, the SnoMoBike will leave a converted mountain bike in the proverbial dust. Snomobile and cross country trails, roads closed for the winter and like areas will serve as stomping ground for the SnoMoBike.

Do you think we could get one?



Much as I like my Soma Morning Rush, if you hit a pothole when it's full then you get wet.



I can't believe no one managed to pick up a copy of The Times yesterday. Now how am I supposed to find out what Tuesday's answers were?

Wednesday, February 08, 2006


Seen this?

That's pretty neat but can't really see it doing much good.

If there were that many blokes crowded around my girl i'd have to assume she'd not quite got round to telling them she hasn't got any use for dangly bits

Rest of the site is pretty cool too. Good stuff for new drivers.



Cool, yeah? Didn't you sleep much last night? I think maybe you are drinking too much coffee.



I like: smoking a rollie while watching the ducks (just to see their enormous feet). Splitting lanes past fuming cagers. Spinning at 120 rpm at that magic point when the chain disappears and before it all gets frantic. Glow rope. Clipless pedals. Really good, fresh coffee, the way Bilbo makes it. The smell of Ben's hair when we go to bed at night.

I DON'T like: POBs. Die die die die die die! The bicycle is a thing you can use for going, like, really, really fast. If you want to be indecisive get a room and a couple of hookers and stay the hell outta my way!

I also DON'T like: well, lots of things. But today it's mostly POBs who don't look the fuck to see what's coming before slipping off the pavement like a big turd slipping into the pan.


5 down

Room for drink in car before Prohibition.



Tuesday, February 07, 2006


I had a puncture!

As you well know. Going to have to replace those tyres.


Stop time!



Look what I found!

According to that font of all worldly knowledge The Beeb, there was a clown memorial yesterday. Some old geezer. Makes me think of Terry Pratchett, that. Especially a clown priest. A clown priest? I didn't know you could get those. Read about it in the Times yesterday as well, while failing to do the crossword (what the hell was that clue about Prohibition?) They ended the ceremony by throwing custard pies at the priest.

Hey, maybe they could get that priest in to Clown Camp. Boffo is looking really depressed. Did you see him in the diary tent yesterday? All his greasepaint was smudged and he looked like he had been crying. I think he's got a thing for Bingo, you know. You can just tell, man. I mean, look at the expression on his face when they made him put the custard pie in Bingo's face. It's been like days since they were allowed to do clown shit and he still didn't want to do that to Bingo. But I mean, like, that's never going to work with Jo-Jo Cramping his style.

There's some seriously fucked up shit going on in that Blue Tent, I'm telling you.

Monday, February 06, 2006



Girl, that is nasty. Can we make this easier on the eye for the WAP generation, d'ya think?


Bollox to it

That'll do for the moment. Got to hit the streets.



Man, that's ugly. D'you think we can find someone to do some sort of design type thang or something?


Christ on a bike

Well, Corbie on a bike anyway. Got to get this thing working before the gang eats all the jam doughnuts.

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